Ready or not, here I come. Maybe.

Let me begin by saying that last night I sat on my couch watching a basketball game sans RCB. Um, who am I and what have I done with RD?

Ok, now down to business. As seems to be happening quite a bit recently (and slightly out of character for me, but maybe I have a new character emerging), a lunchtime conversation I was having with a gal pal turned to the subject of bedroom activities. The impetus of the conversation was actually quite amusing: I was saying how, because I have been watching so many sporting events on television, I have come to realize how prolific the commercials for ED are and how it has become a joke with me and RCB.

Now, I realize it is a drastic segue, but our talk did eventually turn to what happens when one or both parties are unable to culminate the activities, if you will.

You know, if there's no peak...no climax...no pinnacle...no...fine, no orgasm.

Sometimes, things happen. But, what if it's perpetual on one or both sides? Do you talk about it? If so, how do you bring it up? Is that an obvious indication that the sex is bad, or is it just a force of nature? If you're the girl, do you take lessons learned from Meg Ryan and fake it, hoping he doesn't realize it? What if he calls you on it--how can you justify this blatant insult on his manhood? (I recognize, through my extensive magazine related research, that emulating Sally may not be the best idea because 1. you are accepting less than what you want/need, and 2. it doesn't help to make anything better. How can you and he work to achieve "the big o" if you don't address it? - or so says the magazines.) If he's the one who is having trouble, do you acknowledge it or do you roll over and go to bed?

More importantly, what happens if this evasion of pleasure becomes a common occurence? Are there underlying issues that are causing this? Are either one of both of you just not that into it any more? Is it grounds for a break-up? Are sex and its benefits more important than the friendship and companionship that also make up the relationship?

I realize that in an open and honest relationship, these are all things that can and should be discussed in an easy manner and that should be worked on together with your partner. However, I also realize the sensitive nature of this subject and the various implications that come with it. It's hard to soften the blow when you're the girl and it is he who is having the performance issues. Interestingly enough, it's probably easier for the girl to talk about it if she's the one with the issue. But, conversely, it's probably difficult for the man to hear that his woman isn't pleased, that she's not enjoying the interaction to its greatest capacity. Is it an ego thing? Does that make it harder (or not, whatever the case may be)?

Seems to be a sticky subject.